Allan Takes Aim Blog

Marriage is not an appropriate title for same sex unions

Posted on: 19 August 2011

I invite serious comment on this blog

Without knowing anything about me some people call me homophobic because I oppose same sex marriage. As a believer in free speech they can call me what they like though more years ago than I care to remember, I gave up the childish game of name-calling.

That said let me add a few more details to those who still play this childish game: I am blind to people’s colour, ethnicity, and sexual make up. So as the name callers now have this information I invite them to create a new name for me. 

But one last piece of information: before they start creating a new name, let em advise them that I am agnostic and my opposition to same sex marriage is based on historical evidence that, even in pre Judeo Christian societies, marriages were seen as special contracts between heterosexual males and females, that age and circumstance permitting, could create children. Because of their importance, society called them marriage contracts, a title still observed, even in the world’s least sophisticated societies. And so children are born.

However, children’ s real genetic make up is often is not determined until later when different genders arise with sexual needs that can only be met by others of the same gender. The result: humanity becomes a complicated mix of heterosexuals – male and female- homosexuals, lesbians and people of other gender. This mixture of genders often causes complications in society for the individuals concerned and their families.

One such complication is that some, but not all, homosexuals, lesbians and people of other genders, claim they are being denied their human rights because Australian law says people of the same sex cannot marry.

I can only say I have never thought of “Marriage” as a human right although it has become a “rite.” Marriage for me has always been a contract that millenniums ago, came to be recognised as the title created by society for heterosexuals joined in unions that would be responsible for human regeneration.

Speaking as an individual, I believe all human beings are equal, but different – and not just sexually. But believing all people are equal canot hide either the differences or the scientific fact that no laws can ever make non – heterosexuals genetically the same as heterosexuals. By the same token, it was society that created the title marriage, not a God of religion.

Sadly at times, the difference between the different groups leads to discrimination that must be eradicated for the benefit of society To do this I believe that education programmes that help teach people to be blind to the colour, ethnicity and sexual make up, should start as early in childhood as possible.

And also as a means of reducing discrimination, same sex couples wishing to contract with each other should rejoice and celebrate their difference with heterosexuals, rather than both groups engage in hostilities that are anything but a tribute to humanity. And a word to heterosexual couples: not only would they do well to remind themselves that it isn’t a crime not to be able to be a father or mother but remember also that often heterosexual couples are discriminated against if they don’t bear children. 

But if only to show my own human frailty I get irritated hearing two women in a relationship speaking of pregnancy as if it was a right and that it had occurred without male assistance. And I am irritated further when their demeanour suggests the expected child has been conceived only as a case of keeping up with the Jones’s or a show maternal capacity. This, for me, further serves to illustrate why Marriage is not a title that should be conferred on same-sex couples.

Nor is the previous paragraph an example of my misogyny (indeed I am a philogynist) it is but the means of re-inforcing why the push for marriage between two people of the same sex should be resisted.

And the same applies to men because two men in a homosexual relationship cannot conceive a child. In their case too, it illustrates why the relationship doesn’t deserve the title marriage.


33 Responses to "Marriage is not an appropriate title for same sex unions"

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Long or short send it. I always read what people send me but as for taking aim at same sex mariage ithought I offered a very sensible solution, a solution accepted by a homosexual nephew and lesbian niece in my own very large extended family. They seemed to recognise that there will be conditions caused by biological not legal factors that will apply in a marriage contract that cannot apply in a non marriage contract.

Allan, your argument is not valid. You only make one point for not allowing same-sex marriage as far as I can see:

“my opposition to same sex marriage is based on historical evidence that, even in pre Judeo Christian societies, marriages were seen as special contracts between heterosexual males and females, that age and circumstance permitting, could create children.”

So men and women who cannot reproduce should not be allowed to marry? Come on!

Historical evidence tells us that for thousands of years women were (still are in some countries) second class citizens.

Historical evidence tells us that for thousands of years punishment of minor crimes like petty theft were (still are in some countries) dealt with in the most brutal ways.

Historical evidence tells us how things WERE. Not how things should be.

The rest of your post is mostly blather defending yourself from being called discriminatory. Well you are.

In modern day society, marriage is seen by many as a public bond between 2 people. Defacto relationships and civil unions are often seen as lesser. Gay people should be able to get married to be equal and so that society sees them as equal. The more they are seen as equal, the less discrimination and abuse there will be. Simple.

Someone needs to be educated. It’s 2011 you know!!


Thanks for your comment in reply which suggests to me you don’t see very far. That apart your first paragraph quote did not come from the article nor did your question ‘So men and women who cannot reproduce should not be allowed to marry?’ As for the article being blather, re-reading your own post describes blather better than I can.

And ascribing to me words to support your own arguments is not only egregiously bad, it suggests your own arguments are inadequate. For example: your argument that ‘Gay people should be able to get married to be equal and so that society sees them as equal’ is
fatuous, or don’t you believe Australia is an egaltarian country?

I suggest too, that you should do more reading of history. That said, and because it is your right to have an opinion, long may you keep exercising it.

I think a lot of people need to be educated.

You’re welcome to the job

Hasn’t marriage been a contract about distribution and control of property for most of it’s existence?

Even if you are correct, and the primary goal of marriage across all cultures is the production of children, the fact is that in our culture right now, most people define marriage as a commitmen between two people to publicly declare their love and fidelity. Denying adults the right to make that commitment is discriminitory regardless of whether your reasons are based on religion or a misguided belief hat childless marriages are abnormal or undesirable.

What difference does it make to you or me if any two people enter the legal contract or marriage? What right do we have to dictate which individuals any consenting may select to marry? How does using a consequence of sexual orientation to determine the legality of marriage not fit the definition of discrimination?

You say you’re blind to people’s sexual orientation, yet list ways in which sexual orientation makes individuals differen from the norm. They must make discrimination in braille these days.

Thank you for your comments. Your first comment is partially correct. Some marriages were really property settlements but some were also the result of love; while a good many were for the purpose of acquiring and retaining power.

However, I must take issue with you attributing to me in the article that I espoused the view that producing children was the function of marriage. I made no such inference. Indeed that my daughter and son in law married even knowing that they would be childless (as do many other couples) directly refutes your comment about childless marriage.

And as for marriage being a public commitment to love and commitment the only such public commitment I know of is before a handful of relatives and friends. Let me point out also that many people live together as man and wife even without such limited without public commitment. No doubt many will continue to do so. Let me add also that I come from a very large extended family that publicly accepts one homosexual and one lesbian as cousins.

As to why I think the marriage contract should apply to heterosexuals is that the responsibilities of marriage that determine how life should be lived if there are children are different to that of a non-heterosexual union.

Finally: I think the Braille remark in the last paragraph of your comment is in poor taste apart from the fact that it also seems to show you are simply intent on finding discrimination even where none exists.

You say “it was society that created the title marriage”.

Surely that means society is free to re-define marriage as society itself changes? Societies have changed from monarchies to democracies, from women as chattel to women as equals. Why should marriage be the sole institution immune to change?

Paul, if you re-read the article you’ll see I redefining marriage as simply another legal contract called a marriage contract that is signed by a a man and a woman . It will not be superior to the legal contract between two people of the same sex. Clearly from a biological view the terms and conditions of each contract will vary on some matters.

I’m in the US, and I wish someone would put the argument as succinctly here. I completely agree. I’m Christian, but for the most part my reasons for feeling this way and yours are the same.

If you want to try and publicise the blog around your neck of woods, just go ahead.

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